Hollywood Scanner Blog

Looks like Amy Winehouse’s vacation in St. Lucia is going even better than anyone ever expected.  As seen in various reports over the past few days, her sex life’s going great guns, as she hooks up with attention-seeking bit player Joshua Bowman (Who?  See, I told you.), and now it looks like she’s training for some Celebrity Death Match tournament, or maybe even an invasion of Gaza or something.  Just like Jean Claude Van Damme, Amy is showing herself to be a limber little thing who can do full splits with ease.  Well, as anyone who’s been following Amy Winehouse’s scandal sheets knows (Yes, it’s an actual a career), Amy’s very good at spreading her legs, so the moves she’s being shown here by her martial arts sensei aren’t new to her.  Hell, even the upside-down position of her leg splits is probably something she’s done before in some naughty frenzy with her estranged partner Blake Fielder-Civil.

And speaking of Fielder-Civil, I’m sure he’s the one who’s going to get a taste of Amy’s newfound martial arts skillz.  He’s started divorce proceedings now after all those reports of her infidelities on the beautiful beaches of St. Lucia.  I bet she thought she was giving him some verbal karate chops with statements to the press like “When I’m with Josh I don’t need drugs to feel good because he makes me feel so amazing.  We just had sex… can’t you tell?”  Now she’s the one reeling from his legal assault, although I bet the line “Blake was rubbish in bed,” really hit him where it hurts.  Oh well, now that Amy’s one with the Matrix, she can use all her downloaded martial arts knowledge to pound him into the ground.  Then she can challenge Manny Pacquiao for the title of best pound-for-pound fighter next.

Well, we can only wish Amy Winehouse luck in her bid to get back in shape, so hopefully the next time she shows her ta tas, which you can see on this site, she won’t scare our balls into hiding.  Check out that site for other hot celeb content if Amy Winehouse’s juggs aren’t your thing, and that’s completely understandable.

Verne Troyer, who was in the news last year when his personal porn movie was leaked to the public on the net, is back in the showbiz papers thanks to another ex-lover.  This ex-girlfriend of his is another babe, just like his last one, and it sorta makes you wonder why this little guy gets a lot more scorching hot tail than you do, don’t it?  Well, if the trade-off is being laughed at in the tabloids and gossip blogs because your exes have to indulge the public’s appetite for details about midget sex, then okay, maybe I’d rather pay for an escort instead.  Not that former Playmate Genevieve Gallen is probably much different.  She married Verne in 2004 after they were introduced at a party by Hugh Hefner himself, and I bet she didn’t know that there wouldn’t be any new Austin Powers movies for a long time when she did that.  Well, that’s a Playmate for ya, all breasts and no investment portfolio.

So why is she telling her story now to ‘The News of The World‘ rag?  Well, maybe it has something to do with Troyer being part of the Celebrity Edition of  the ‘Big Brother’ reality show this year, along with stars such as Coolio, LaToya Jackson and the delicious, busty Lucy Pinder.  And what did she reveal to the tabloid about Verne that’s got everyone ho-ho-hoing like Santa Claus this post-Christmas season?  Oh, nothing much, just some revelations about him getting wasted a lot.  One special Valentine’s night she even got all dressed up in red for him, and he was so excited while making her pose while he took photographs — then he passed out before doing anything to her beyond that.  Hell, he sounds like a regular guy after all.  I’d rather laugh at Genevieve instead for dressing up in all these costumes for Verne, as seen in these images.

But in the end, I’d rather just watch Verne Troyer’s sex tape instead.  Why not check it out, and other celeb amateur sex videos too, here on this site?

No, they didn’t break up with each other.  That would’ve been a sizzling hot lesbian fantasy that would completely push anything Lindsay Lohan does off the front page.  But it looks like it hasn’t been an enjoyable New Year for those two, separately.  For Katy Perry, it was her boytyoy Travis McCoy who broke up with her.  And then he posts a rap about it on his blog.  ‘Cause nothing says “I’m gangsta and I just kicked my ho out the door” more than a blog.  With some rap in it.  Oh well, it’s not like he’s done any drive-by shootings, he’s just from the band Gym Class Heroes.  Check out his amazing rhymes here (and by amazing I mean retarded):

My friends always tell me how I’m lucky to possess
The best looking girl in the whole U.S.
But every time you scream, you blow your finesse
Tryin’ to dis the Profess-
Or twenty-four hours of acting sore
Sometimes I wish you’d come down with lockjaw
So I don’t have to take in the breakin’
You treat me like a burnt piece of bacon
It seems like just two years
Back when we were bonded and not pierced
But now I keep itchin’ to jet
Sitting’ in the chair just to stare, set to sprint
Yo, sweetheart, you better take a hint
I say it now like I said it before
I’m lookin’ at the front door

Hmmm…  Maybe if you throw in some machine gun fire it would sound better in your head?  Oh well, I guess that’s why Katy Perry’s been showing off her juggs a lot lately.  And that bodes well for us, when it comes to the recent break up of Jennifer Love Hewitt and her former fiance Ross McCall.  If seeing Katy Perry’s voluptuous funbags on display in bikinis and skimpy outfits recently was hot, imagine how the world would be with Hewitt’s generous set of grapefruits being displayed.  Yes, the ice caps are going to have a hard time surviving this year with Jennifer Love Hewitt swinging around her voluptuous rack as she looks for a replacement for McCall.

To remind you of why Jennifer Love Hewitt’s chest being unfettered is a good thing, check out her naughty images and flicks here on this site!

Come on, we all thought it was weird, wasn’t it?  Not that hooking up with Marilyn Manson wasn’t bizarre enough.  But with Manson’s ex-wife being Dita Von Teese, when Evan Rachel Wood started showing up at movie events dressed in black, with her hair dyed black and styled in classic pin-up girl style, we all thought it was more than just kinda grotesque.  And no, it wasn’t because he was a late 30-ish Satanic rocker and she was a 19-year old Hollywood ingenue.  Hey, hooking up with a young hottie’s our fantasy too, right?

But trying to look like your boyfriend’s ex is just too loser-ish for a hottie like Evan Rachel.  We know she can do better than that!  Well, now that they’ve broken up, guess who’s a bright summer's day once again?  Take a look at the all-new Evan Rachel Wood — same as the last all-new Evan Rachel Wood, but with less absinthe!  With “The Wrestler”, starring Mickey Rourke, generating a lot of buzz, it looks like her career hasn’t been hurt by her association with the Antichrist Superstar himself.  Of course, if you’re into goth chicks, then this probably isn’t a change that you’ll enjoy from Evan Rachel Wood.

Well, there’s always this site to check out, where you can still get wood from watching her do naughty, nasty things that Marilyn Manson probably thought up!  Hell, even if you’re into her more bright and sunshiney look, you’ll enjoy her here!

Hey wait, wasn’t she a regular at the rehab center just a few months ago?  And isn’t Samantha Ronson supposed to be watching out for her?  Well, I guess that their recent fight after Samantha Ronson caught her dancing with her ex, Calum Best has taught Ronson that a wasted and inebriated Lindsay Lohan is much easier to keep close than a fully sober one.  With Lindsay’s recent interview that she wasn’t really a lesbian, just in love with one, there was hope for all the horny dudes out there that Lindsay was geting tired of all that rug munching and finally jonesing for some boner.

With Lindsay and Sam’s deep girl on girl kiss here, then I guess we’re going to have to wait a bit longer.  Which is weird.  We should be cheering on hot celebrities to have even more sapphic escapades, but with Lindsay we just can’t wait for her to ditch this chick, because Ronson is just so creepy-looking and masculine that there’s just no lesbian heat at all for us when we see them together.  Anyway, here’s Lindsay mixing herself some Vodka and Red Bulls, with her loving girlfriend taking a break from her DJ set now and then to lock lips with her.  Awww… what a sweet couple.  If all this hurts your eyes and you just want to see some scorching photographs of Lindsay solo, or with a real guy, then just click on this link.  I know I will!

“Crank 2: High Voltage” sure is cranking up the testosterone levels of every red-blooded male movie fan I know, even before the movie is out in the theaters!  We’re not even talking about Jason Statham’s kick-ass action scenes and bloody violence this movie is sure to have.  All the news and pictures recently featuring Amy Smart in various levels of undress are all we need to declare that we’re going to love this movie, just because it’s got lots of views of Amy Smart’s tits!  First there was that shot of Amy Smart’s nipple slip, while she was fighting Corey Haim, of all people.  And now here are photos from the set of the movie showing Amy Smart topless, with only nipple tape covering up her perky boobies.  Now that’s close enough to nudity for us!  When the movie comes out, you know we’ll be ready to capture all the naked action for everyone’s pleasure, particularly ours…

Amy Smart’s had lots of topless moments throughout her career, which is why she’s definitely one of our favorites.  You can check out those naughty moments, and more, when you click on this link!

And it’s not the funny-looking one or the one who’s been linked to Disney tween stars.  No, the Jonas brother who’s got a thing for Hermione Granger is none other than Joe Jonas himself, the heartthrob frontman of the teen pop rock group.  When asked on whether any of his brothers were dating someone, Joe answered “Not, not yet, unfortunately.” Then he adds, “There’s a few people that we would like to be gossiped about. That’d be nice. I’ve always had a crush on Emma Watson!”

Well, we think we know why, and you probably do to, if you’ve been online anytime during the past few months.  We’re talking about Emma Watson’s upskirt pic by the paparazzi showing that she’s a naughty young woman now, who favors see-through panties.  Joe Jonas is just acting like any other horny young guy who’s seen his fictional crush flash her pink.  Now he’s probably got fantasies about her running through his head, but the difference between him and any other Harry Potter fan out there is that he can make his fantasies come true.

For a reminder of why that Emma Watson fantasy is so alluring, check out more of those scandalous upskirt shots here on this site.

Well last I heard, Pamela Anderson was shacking up again with her ex-husband and sex-tape partner, Tommy Lee.  But it seems that Pamela clarified on Ryan Seacrest’s radio show that their relationship was not romantic, even though they were living under the same roof.  It looks like it’s really just for the kids though, because recently Pamela Anderson has been spotted meeting up with friends in LA with this guy in tow, and it turns out he’s a member of the Abu Dhabi Royal family.  Pamela was there recently for the Make A Wish Foundation, and had decided to put up an eco-friendly hotel there.  Eventually, she met the royal family while she was there, and then it looks like one of them hooked up with her, and received the pet name Milk-Sheik, or Milk for short, whenever she mentions him in public conversation.  Well, she’ll certainly look good running across the Arabian sands in slow-motion while wearing a chador, we think.

Hopefully, this guy is one kinky sheik, and he’ll want to make another Pamela Anderson sex tape, to put his stamp on her and assert his manhood Vs. Tommy Lee’s stellar turn in their last fuck video, which you can see when you click on this link!

If you’re a young and horny guy, then you’ve probably got a thing for the babes of “The Hills”.  This MTV reality show has been picked up for its fourth season, and the girls on the show are considered to be some of today’s hottest “It Girls“, especially out in LA, where the show is based.  That means that they get lots of free clothes from top designers in the area, to build up their brands through exposure on their show.  But while Lauren Conrad and Audrina Patridge have been receiving tons of that stuff, Heidi Montag is a potential endorser nobody wants to touch with a ten-foot pole!  As Fox News reported:

One of Los Angeles’ leading fashion reps (who is often responsible for dressing the likes of Miley Cyrus, Angelina Jolie, Fergie and Carmen Electra) told Pop Tarts that Heidi’s public persona is a little too cheap even for casual (but classy) brands.

“They don’t want their stuff on Heidi, even despite the fact that she is very media-friendly and is photographed a lot,” the rep said. “It’s just not the caliber of celebrity most clients go for.”

Ouch.  That’s got to hurt, and I hope it hurts like getting stabbed in the gut with a hot poker and left to die in the wilderness, especially for Spencer Pratt.  Boy, that superficial publicity hound must be seething that the pony he’s backing is being ignored by those that really matter!  It looks like all they’re good for are cheaply-staged publicity shots in supermarkets.  But then, that’s why they have no cred in the first place!  Click here to see the only thing that matters about Heidi Montag — her boobs!

At a press conference in Venice to promote her new movie “The Burning Plain“, Charlize Theron had an encounter of the psudo-stalkerish kind when a reporter at the event actually proposed marriage to this statuesque hottie.  The reporter began with: “I would like to ask you something Charlize Theron.  First of all, I really like you so much and have a lot of respect for you but I would like to marry you — and I have a question: which side do you prefer to sleep?”  And Charlize fired back immediately with a quick-witted “The side that you are not on.”

“Oh, then I think it doesn’t work,” the dejected reporter replied.

Charlize continued by keeping the situation lighthearted, jokingly calling for security and continuing, “The man with the red… you are very cute, but you know my boyfriend will kill you.  Yeah, I am married, I am taken, whatever,” Charlize added. “How much money do you have?”

“I am poor,” the journalist answered.  “See, we are gonna have to talk about that,” Theron said. “I will talk to you later. I have something for you, you are ready? Ananas [meaning pineapple]. There you go, sit down.”

Boy, talk about your awkward situations.  I’d be cringing if I knew that guy, but then can we really blame him?  Just check out this pic of Charlize around the same time, frolicking in the surf in her bikini.  Yeah, she could drive a guy crazy with lustful heat, as you can see when you check out her even hotter pics here on this link!