Hollywood Scanner Blog

It’s been a while since Shauna Sand appeared on the pages of Playboy. So in case you’ve forgotten what her breasties look like (after all, those pages of your copy might be stuck together forever), Shauna decided to have a little fun under the sun with her tits out for all to see. She gamely shoves them in the face of an unknown male companion (her latest victim, I presume) even going as far as lying on top of him and attempting to cut off his respiratory system. Or at least that’s what the pictures looked to me.

True to her famewhore form, Shauna had no qualms about displaying her massive boobage even when she spotted the stalkerazzi snapping away from some ways off. I find it hard to believe that this was a secluded place where photographers sneaked around to follow her. In this day and age of Twitter, I’m certain Shauna tipped off the paps about her location. Although, the idea of someone as old as Shauna knowing how to Twitter just tickles my funny bone.

When all is said and done, everyone gets what they want. Shauna got the publicity she so desperately needs to stay relevant in the celebusphere. Bloggers (like me) have something new to bitch about and tear apart. The paparazzi got to make some money by selling those photos. Heck, even that dude she’s with (I have this strange feeling she just grabbed him off the beach and started making out with him) got to know what plastic boobs felt like. Although, this being LA, he must’ve felt a few of them by now. So, high-fives for everyone! Once again, the famewhoring capabilities of Shauna Sand entraps us all. When her giant boobies beckon, we are nothing under their power. See more of that famewhore power with these celebs who, whether deliberate or not, we can’t help but follow every move. Check them out.

It’s gotta be tough to be known as just someone’s sister. Forever living under someone’s shadow. Constantly waiting for your time to shine. Such a fate has befallen many a celebrity siblings. So is it no surprise that Kourtney Kardashian likes to hit the sauce way too much. Wouldn’t you do the same if your sister was gigantic-assed slutbag classless Kim Kardashian. I’d be needing a new liver by now.

Kourtney was photographed leaving My House club wobbling and slurring and looking pretty much hammered like there was no tomorrow. She needed to be escorted by an unnamed female companion because it looked like she was gonna fall over at any second. (On a side note, it looks like the female companion is trying to cop a feel of Kourtney’s boob)

Now, while I can only speculate what exactly Kourtney got drunk over, but I have a few ideas. Yes, she just split with her douchebag cheating boyfriend Scott Disick a short while ago and maybe she’s still hurting over that. She should still be, since she mentioned in recent interviews that she’ll stave off dating for a while. That asshole must’ve hurt her bad. Why would anyone wanna cheat on Kourtney? She’s so smokin’ hot! This Scott is a real asshole nobody moocher mediawhore who was just clearly using Kourtney for her celebrity.

Speaking of celebrity, it brings me to my next speculation: Keeping Up With The Kardashians. Yes, the new season has just started and, although it hurts me to say this, maybe it’s all just a publicity stunt. She’s probably not even drunk. Hey, it’s possible. Coupled with Kourtney’s appearance in Maxim this month, it’s perfect publicity. Although, if you ask me, stagerring out of a bar drunk is not the way to grab headlines. You gotta go big, scandalous. Like the things you’ll find here - celebrities caught in moments they do not wanna be seen in. Check it out.

She pretends to be Chinese while goofing off with a bunch of friends, the photos are leaked, and a shit-storm of controversy falls upon her. And Miley Cyrus’s response? “Stop treating me like a celebrity! I’m just a person!” Okay, I’m paraphrasing that, but basically that was the gist of her MySpace blog entry defending herself from all the nasty comments netted by the pic.

Now, she’s facing another sort of controversy where she again does her best to try and defend her actions. She’s gotten flack when recent photos of her jogging with panty model boyfriend Justin Gaston. The two were sweaty, he was shirtless, and she showing her glistening 16-year-old cleavage in a bikini top under a low-cut t-shirt. Bloggers and perverts from across the blogsphere pounced on the pics and lambasted Miley for not being a good example to teens and tweens and whatever other ‘eens she’s whoring herself out to.

Defending herself, she goes on Ryan Seacrest’s (yes, the same guy who tried to high-five a blind guy on American Idol) radio show, and spoke like the spoiled, irresponsible teen she is. She’s frustrated that people are making a big deal about the things she does — yadda yadda yadda and concludes with “I don’t get the big whoop, but whatever.”

Seeing her side, yes I do agree that it’s unfair to judge each and every thing she does. I mean, come on - have you seen how 16-year-old girls dress these days. It’s like they’re auditioning for Flavor of Love. Miley’s outfit is tame by comparison. Having said that, most 16-year-olds aren’t making millions of dollars to be a poster child for good-girl behavior. Most 16-year-olds don’t have legions of impressionable fans who will probably do exactly what she does. I mean, I’m surprised there hasn’t been an epidemic of 16-year-old girls having 21-year-old boyfriends across America.

So in conclusion, Miley, be responsible enough to act like the little Disney princess execs want you to be. It’ll only be less than two years ’til you turn 18. Then you’ll be free to slut it up as much as you want. Not that you haven’t already started. Drop by here to see what I’m talking about.

Remember, once upon a time, when Lindsay Lohan first sprouted into hottie-ness, her massive boobs and curvy body was the fantasy of every hot-blooded male around? Her little laugh, sweet smile, and sexy innocence would just let your mind go to the most nastiest places? Her comic timing, her natural talent, her all-around likability that made you overlook the shortcomings of her acting ability? Remember that?

Instead now, we get this…

A hollow shell of this once happy and promising personality, completely consumed by the mass media, spiraling down into the world of tabloid shows, gossip columns, and bad-girl behavior. And now, as has been gossiped over for months on end, we see her like this. Or rather, what’s left of her. Is it the state of her career (bordering on zero) that’s making her do this to herself? The pressure to stay thin in Hollywood? Trying to catch up with her lesbian lover’s body (which is impossible, because I still believe that Sam Ronson is really a 14-year-old boy). Whatever the reason, it’s starting to look dangerous.

I’m sure a lot of you will agree with me when I say she actually looked better during her Mean Girls years. At least you had something to hold on to. She was wholesomely steamy, with just a hint of naughtiness. And, of course, those boobs. They were huge enough to get lost in. Where’d they go? Then there’s that sweet, plump ass that bounced playfully when she walked (or better yet, ran in slow motion). I mean, just look at the girl who played the villain in one of Lilo’s movies Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen Megan Fox who’s making tongues wag with her curvy hot body, landing on Sexiest Women lists around the world.

Seriously Lindsay, bring back the poundage. Go to Anorexics Anonymous, eat some cheescake, do some actually funny comedies and get back into the spotlight were you belong. In the meantime, you can check this out for other Lindsay Lohan scandals as well as other gossip heavy celebs.

Alicia Keys is one of the sexiest, most sultry performers out there right now.  Her powerful and husky voice and beautiful face have got all the horndogs mesmerized, so how come these bikini photos snapped by the stalkerazzi somehow don’t do it for some people?  Well, as a fan, I’m still stoked about seeing Alicia in a bikini, but as other, more objective people have pointed out, there just isn’t enough sizzle here for the ordinary horndog looking for some hot jerk off material.

I guess Alicia Keys’ lack of ripe knockers just doesn’t appeal to some people, which is too bad for them.  I’m totally enjoying these photographs of Alicia as she relaxes by the poolside of some hotel, all the way down to the way she eats her snacks.  Sure, it’s a bit scary how she scarfs down those vittles like she’s really enjoying herself too much and you can just imagine her eating order after order until she blimps out into Klump-sized proportions, but really, wouldn’t you want to hang out with a hottie who’s got an appetite rather than some anorexic model who’ll just push her food around the plate?  (Just as long as it’s not Britney Spears, who’ll probably eat you up too, but not in the way you like.)  Yeah, so it might be showing a bit on her thighs, but she’s still one sexy hottie in my book.  Just check out that behind and forget about her titties by concentrating on her tush!

So for those who’re a bit underwhelmed by these Alicia Keys bikini photographs, you ought to check out this link, where you can see Alicia at her sexiest and raunchiest.  Maybe that’ll remind you why you’ve been drooling over this honey and buying her albums.  Yup, it’s because she’s beautiful and hot, and ok, talented too.  So forget the bad angle of these stalkerazzi shots and remember why Alicia is a babe by enjoying her dirty photographs and videos on that site.