Hollywood Scanner Blog

Turning her rail-thin back on carpet-munching forever (it seems), Lindsay Lohan spent a wild and crazy night with a bunch of dudes proving once and again that you can’t put a horny slut down. Yup, she was seen partying hard with a bunch of dudes and is now jumping from man to man hoping to score that one who would not only make her get her shit together, but give her the much-needed protein shake that she’s been missing all this time dating Samantha Ronson. Maybe now that she’s got a regular supply of sperm, she’ll get back a few pounds and not make her look like a concentration camp survivor.

Yup, she was seen recently looking as thin as usual and it’s only getting worse. And by worse I mean her boobs are finally feeling the burn. Known for her massive jugs, Lindsay has built a career out of them. And with the rumors of anorexia swirling around her, her breasts seemed to be unaffected. But lately her boobies have flattened out like someone let the air out of them, sagging down to her bellybutton it seems. Which is bad news for LiLo and her supposed foray into live, on-stage stripping. Who would want to pay good money to got a fancy Las Vegas hotel and watch some crack-addicted starlet bare her flat titties on stage. No one, that’s who. So hopefully she gets those babies back on track before they hit her knees.

And so, what can we expect out of our dear Miss Lohan now that she’s back on the straight and narrow (but for her hopefully curved and thick)? Maybe we’ll see her a bit happier from now on, a bit more satisfied. After all, it takes you missing something to know that’s what you really want. So this time away from the peen would help her re-evaluate her career, life plan, and spirituality. See, all the men of the world are right - the penis is a wonderful thing. And now that Lindsay is back on it, the world will be a much better place because of it. As wonderful as the wild and crazy celebs that you’ll find right here.

Kelly Brook is arguably one of the most fuckable women around. She’s got that womanly figure that looks good in and out of clothes. She looks awesome in a bikini. And she’s got a sweet yet slightly naughty face perfect for looking up at you while she gives you a blowjob. She’s been a staple of the British tabloids for quite some time and despite the fact that those papers do their best to find something cheap and trashy to write about her, they never seem to succeed since she carries herself in a classy manner. In a bikini frolicking on the beach, or attending a red carpet event dressed to the nines, or even in sweats in candid workout pics, you look at her and never think for one second this girl is cheap. Then… I saw these pics.

Taken in 2000 for the London premiere of the Guy Ritchie film Snatch, Kelly dressed like a two-dollar prostitute who got a gift certificate for a Bob Mackie gown and chose the skankiest outfit usually worn only during the ice skating event at the winter Olympics. Why on earth would she wear an outfit like this? Sure she’s got an awesome form and likes to show it off, but why would anyone in their right mind wear something like this deliberately. I almost feel like Kelly lost a bet or something and had to wear this fugly creation.

Granted this was 9 years ago, and her reputation of being a classy fashionista perhaps was years away. Maybe she took one look at these shots when they first came out and said “Oh my God, I look fucking ridiculous!!” and hence, the fashionista was born out of embarassment. So I guess it was a good thing that she wore this outfit and realized how bad she looked. See, everything happens for a reason - even really bad fashion choices. Hollywood is rife with those, and you can see them all here, along with celebrities caught in embarassing situations that almost never requires clothing.